Facebook. Sweetie. Boychik. Come here. We have to have another chat. About the creepy.

You’re doing it again.

I know that you want to be all things to all people, and that now you have stockholders to earn for. And hey, new features build buzz and keep folks in the app, rather than zipping over to Yelp to find restaurants and reviews.

But you could maybe be not so stalker-y? 

According to the fine Brits at The Register, the new Place Tips feature, “tracks users’ whereabouts and inserts information about nearby businesses and points of interest into their news feed.”

And that puppy is not opt-in. It’s turned on by default.

Ew.

FB — can I call you FB? — I think this is a strategic misfire. You keep getting bad press about privacy issues, paid no attention to the whole Ello thing, and you’re even still suggesting who users should poke.

Let’s be honest, “suggested pokes” sounds like a weird Craigslist euphemism.

So why not announce this feature and let people toggle it on? You look generous for giving away a cool free thing, you get a more accurate measurement of which of your users like the idea, and you put to rest some of those Facebook-wants-to-eat-your-soul rumors. A win all around!

You didn’t do that, though. You stuck with the creepy approach. And that’s why you’re losing teens, dude. You have to stop hemorrhaging young users.

Look, I’m all for Jeff Bridges’ new super-weird Sleeping Tapes. I love me some monster movies. And I really, truly do understand you want to keep folks in Facebookland for everything possible. But this? Is the wrong kind of creepy.